Lily's Summer
by McFlyingHPGirl
Summary: When Lily gets back from her first year at Hogwarts, she notices Petunia seems to be ignoring her.


Lily's Summer

The rays of the afternoon Sun fall upon the open page in my book as I sit on the window-sill, reading. Occasionally I stop reading and steal a glance at the beautiful view outside. I love Hogwarts, but it's always great to be back home with the people I love. I try to burrow away the worries that keep popping into my head, but after a while I find myself thinking about them again. Usually my worries revolve around Severus. At school it's all about whether Potter is treating him okay or not, and during holidays it's about how he's coping with his family. But now another person seems to have found their way into my mind. Petunia. She's treating me differently. I can tell just by the way she acts around me, as if I'm some kind of stranger. It's been this way ever since I got back and I don't know what to do about it. I realise I'm thinking about it again and try to get back to my book, but it's no use. With a sigh, I close my book and look outside, and see Severus, waving at me. I'm always happy to see him. It's a pity he wasn't sorted into Gryffindor last year. Everything would have been so much better if he had. I run outside to meet him, and we lie down in the grass and talk about everything that's been bothering us, just like we always do. He tells me things are no different at his house, his parents are still fighting and barely notice him. He doesn't give me a chance to express my sympathy, though. "But I'm used to it", he says with a laugh, and then grabs my hand and leads me to the big oak tree near his house where we've spent many a summer making up imaginary worlds we can escape into when things here got too much for us to handle. And there we sit until supper, when mum calls me inside. I want to invite Severus inside too, but I'm worried about Petunia. She's already upset with me, and if I bring Sev with me, she'll probably never talk to me again. So we say bye to each other and plan to meet up here again tomorrow, then I depart.

The dinner table is set with all of my favourite foods, and Petunia sits there with a disgruntled expression. It seems as though Mum forced her to come down and eat with the family. I try to smile at her but she looks away. My heart sinks. What could be the matter? I know she wanted to go to Hogwarts as well, but surely that's not the reason for her to be acting so coldly towards me? "Hey, Tuney, how was your day? We've barely seen each other today!" I try to keep the false cheer in my voice as I desperately look to her, almost begging her to reply with my eyes. There's a long silence, then – "Fine. Yours?" I breathe a sigh of relief. Very monosyllabic, but it's a start. I tell her about my day in great detail, careful to avoid telling any details about Severus, because that would surely fluctuate her mood for the worse. "So what did you do today? You should have come hung out with me!" She glares at me as I say this, and the phrase 'If looks could kill' shoots into my head. "You were with that awful Snape most of the day. I wouldn't be seen with him if my life depended on it." And she picks up her plate and runs out of the living room. I hear her going upstairs, and Dad and I exchange an uncomfortable look. Mum comes back from the kitchen, enquiring about Petunia, and we don't really know what to say. Dinner is spent in silence.

I knock on Petunia's door. "Go away" she mumbles, but I open the door and go in anyway. "What's going on?" I say gently.

"Nothing's going on. Who gave you permission to be in here anyway?"

"I'm just asking because if you don't talk, we can't resolve any issues you have with me!"

"Just go! If we were to resolve issues, it would take a lifetime, because there are so many!"

"Please, Tuney, you're my sister! We can sort this out!"

"Well I wish I weren't your sister. You're such a freak! How can you live with yourself?"

There's a silence. "Well then, if that's the way you feel."

"It is. You can go now."

At a loss for words, I get up and leave, silently closing the door behind me. That wasn't as successful as I'd hoped it'd be. I don't understand. We used to be so close. What went wrong?

For the next few nights, I can't sleep properly. I toss and turn all night and have terrible nightmares where I'm looking for Petunia in the dark, and when I finally find her, I can't reach her. She runs away from me and keeps screaming "Freak!" The days are not much better than the nights. I find myself consumed in thoughts about her and how I could make this better. The only times I manage to slightly forget Petunia is when I'm with Severus. We disappear into our imaginary worlds where only the two of us exist. But sometimes now, Petunia is there too. In my world, where no-one has ever bothered me before, she's there. She's everywhere. So close, and yet so far away because I just can't seem to reach her. At all. She's everywhere. But she's not really there. She spends most of the summer holed up in her bedroom. When she's around me, she pretends I'm not there. It's awful, because I don't know what to do to make things better between us. I don't know what's bothering her so much. I don't want to talk about it to anyone, but one evening I find myself confiding in Severus. "She just won't talk to me, no matter what. What do you think could be wrong?" He looks at me with an amused expression that, for some reason, seems to infuriate me. "What?" I snap at him.

"Well, isn't it obvious?"

"Isn't what obvious?"

"She's jealous of you, of course!"

"What? Don't be ridiculous!"

"I'm not! It's true! I mean, think about it. Everything was good between the two of you before the Hogwarts letter arrived for you. Then she started acting all strange. Well, stranger than she already was, that is." I hit him on the back with my book for saying that, but then I really start to think about it. Could it be true? I remember she sent a letter to Professor Dumbledore last year, too, begging him to accept her into Hogwarts as well. It's a terrible thought, but maybe Severus is right. Maybe she is jealous of me. No, wait, what am I thinking? She can't be jealous of me! "That can't be right," I say, but with less surety than I feel, "Why would Tuney be jealous of me? We're sisters! We don't get jealous of each other." Severus shrugs, "It's just what I think. I don't know, you know her better. Maybe you're right. It's something else." But what could it be? Is she really jealous? I can't ask her about it because whenever I try to talk to her, I seem to make things worse. So for the rest of the summer, I stay quiet. I've tried my best. Now it's her turn. If she's jealous, it's her problem anyway. I vow to myself not to worry about her now, and try to enjoy whatever's left of my summer. I go around town with Sev, to the movies with my parents, to the shops, everywhere. I try to do as many things as I can that will keep my mind occupied so I won't have to think. Yet, no matter how hard I try, there she is. Lurking in my mind with that spiteful smile and that horrible word "Freak" that seems to have stuck in my brain. I just cannot make her go away.

The last day of summer holidays arrives. Everything is still much the same with Tuney and me, and she hardly even looks in my direction and avoids me like the plague. 'Well,' I think, 'Now she won't have to worry about running into me at any time, because I won't be here.' "Petunia!" Mum yells up the stairs, breaking into my thoughts. "We're going to take Lily to the station. Would you like to come too?" There's a silence. There's always a silence now when someone mentions me to Petunia. "Okay" comes the very unexpected reply. At least, I wasn't expecting it. Now what's brought this on? Possibly, she wants to go to the shops and is hoping for a ride. Yes, that must be it. I get into the car. A few minutes later, someone gets in beside me. Petunia. I look at her, then out of the window. Mum and Dad get in the front, and we're off. The radio is turned on. Mum starts talking about some neighbour whose kid was bothering her the other day. I continue to stare outside. Petunia does likewise. We reach the station. It's very crowded. I get all my luggage together, hug Mum and Dad. My motions seem so robotic but I can't help it. The train whistles. It's almost time to go. Suddenly Petunia pulls me to the side. We're separated from Mum and Dad by a stream of students making their way to the train. "Look, I... I'm... I'm sorry for the way I acted." She says hesitantly, looking down at the floor. I stare at her, at a loss for words. Just as I open my mouth to say something – "Come on, Lily! We're gonna miss the train!" It's Severus, pulling at my arm. Petunia looks up. Sees Severus. Her face hardens. She purses her lips, and stalks off before I can stop her. "Tuney!" I call out, but my voice is drowned out by the whistle of the train. It's time to go. Final goodbyes are said, and I'm whisked into the train with the crowd. My eyes search for her everywhere, but she's not there. Tears begin to well up in my eyes as Severus pulls me into an empty compartment. Tries to console me. Tells me I can write to her. Says there's always next summer to make things right between me and her. I hardly notice what he says, and try hard to compose myself. "Hey, Evans!" An infuriating voice breaks straight through my fake composure. I look up, and there's that annoying person again. The holidays weren't the best, but I won't let him ruin my school days. "What do you want, Potter?" He grins and rumples up his hair. This, for some reason, irritates me beyond belief. For a moment, I forget all about my sister and only concentrate on the anger I feel for him. Only he can make me forget about Petunia at a time like this. And not in a good way, because my sadness for her just gets replaced by my anger for him. Somehow I manage to get rid of him and come out of my trance, finally concentrating on Sev's words. It's true, what he said. I can't let thoughts of her spoil my school time. I'll make her come round. And for that, there's always next year.

By Zainab Fawad


End file.
